Magic Mirrors

Magic mirrors are those things people invented to make you look very skinny, very fat or just totally distorted. They were invented to make you laugh at yourself. They belong in a circus. And are aimed at 10 8 years old kids.

I think they are used in dressing rooms in clothe stores to make us look slimmer and ‘trick’ us me into buying the clothes. When I get home…oh boy, do I look bigger all of a sudden!

Anyway at work they are fixing two elevators, in stages, one is completed and I couldn’t wait to get in there. WOW. What a shock.

You know they like putting mirrors in elevators for some cruel reason so we can stare at ourselves and feel strange when someone catches you smiling at your own reflection. But now this new elevator is a thousand times worse. Honestly. They have definitely used a magic mirror in there.

This one makes me look like I have mumps and I was stung by a million wild bees.

My face is always red in the office, but in that small glassy square place – I look like scarlet something. Then my round plump face – well that reminds me of Po the red teletubby.

Po is a female the smallest and youngest of the Teletubbies, she is RED and has an antenna shaped like a stick used for blowing soap bubbles (that must be my static hair waving around). You can imagine how appropriate this is after my piece on Static. I am the short, plump one with the red face in the office. And that elevator, oh my, it makes me smaller and rounder and more red.

It’s not funny this damn mirror is for the circus not for the office. I got such a fright at my own reflection. The worst thing is that they have used bright lights (not the usual dims) and you can only avoid your face if you stare at your shoes….. I am never going in there again!

Seriously what were they thinking?! 

That mirror is flawed, causing optical illusion & distortion and it’s badly mounted.

I’m having a real image crisis lately!  😦